FORKEY

As a pastor, I used a lot of stories to connect people with Biblical truths. I trained myself to allow God to teach me lessons through everyday life. Because of this, I see lessons everywhere. 

Following my stroke, I was desperate for context and understanding of where I was and what God was speaking to my heart. Soon after arriving home, I watched the movie Toy Story 4. I especially felt God speak to me through the character of “Forky.” The little girl Bonnie made Forky from a spork, googley eyes, a pipe cleaner, and glue. Forky became Bonnie’s favorite toy. He was handmade and more valuable to Bonnie than the fancy “real” toys, the store-bought kind. Forky’s problem was that he thought he was trash. Forky was constantly trying to get himself thrown away. The other toys would rescue him from his destructive habit because they knew Bonnie loved her handmade toy and needed Forky.

These are the lessons I learned from Forky:

1. If I think I’m trash, I’ll have no problem trying to throw myself away.

I don’t like to admit this, but I’ve considered every possible way of ending my life. I’ve struggled to see the value in continuing.

As a kid, I remember hearing about a “good-for-nothing” person. They were a person who didn’t contribute to society. It was the greatest shame someone could live with. I felt this shame after my stroke. I was afraid that I was becoming a “good-for-nothing” person. I was unable to contribute to life, and I needed constant care. I was willing to throw it all away because I felt useless. I’ve since received professional help for my destructive thoughts, and I’m learning to find peace in my condition. If you find yourself in this position, I highly encourage you to seek help. 

2. I have a purpose.

Forky didn't realize he was helpful to Bonnie. He helped give her the courage to go to school. She needed him. I’m limited in what I can do since my stroke, but I’ve learned I can still contribute. I have a purpose. I can be of use to God.

When I preached, I often said, “If you're still breathing, God isn’t done with you.” After having my stroke, a friend told me it was time to start believing the stuff I preached.  

I like what the Psalmist wrote: 

Why, my soul, are you downcast?

     Why so disturbed within me?

 Put your hope in God,

     for I will yet praise him,

     my Savior and my God. Psalm 42:5 (NIV)

The Psalmist is telling his soul to hope in God. I’ve had to learn to preach to myself, reminding myself of the many sermons I preached during my decades behind the pulpit.

God could have easily ended my days on March 3, 2019, the day of my stroke. But I’m still here.

The Bible says this about David:

Now when David had served God’s purpose in his own generation, he fell asleep; he was buried with his ancestors and his body decayed. Acts 13:36 (NIV)  

It's as if the Bible says we’re here until we serve God's purpose in our generation.

3. As a person created by God, I’m valuable to Him. He loves me.

David puts it this way in the Bible:  

I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;

     your works are wonderful,

     I know that full well. Psalm 139:14 (NIV)

We’re not mass-manufactured by God. But God has taken great care in hand making each of us. No wonder He sees great value in us.

My sister-in-law sent a gift box to me following my stroke. In it was a sticker that Sarah put on the table where I wrote this blog. It says:

“How cool is it that the same God that created oceans and galaxies looked at you and thought the world needed one of you too.”

I like how Paul states in Ephesians: For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago. Ephesians 2:10 (NLT)